If I Ever Need
by If Wishes Were Blue Skies
Summary: sort of AU. my take on what happened right after the group arrived in Celes. light KuroFai


**A/N:** hey guys! I wanna thank all those who reviewed my last TRC fic, cuz it made me confident enough to post up another one. but just so you know, I wrote this right after chapter 153, I think it was, RIGHT as our group made it into Celes. and this was my idea on what would happen (with added Kuro/Fai-ness, o' course XD). I know more chapters have been posted to contradict this, but that's why I labeled this as an AU. kay, we all straight on that? okie dokie, here we go :D

**Disclaimer: **I don't own any characters in Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle, or anything to do with it. shucks XD

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"If I Ever Need"

by:_ If Wishes Were Blue Skies_

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Upon arriving in Celes, the small group was met with a strong snowstorm, the cold air biting into them immediately. Kurogane glanced at Fai ahead of him, his white coat billowing in the wind, almost contrasting to his and Shaoran's black coats. He wondered for a moment what expression was on the magician's face, but he forgot it when he spotted a figure floating down to them – a figure he recignized with an ornate dress and long, golden-white hair. It was that doll that had appeared when they'd won that chess tournament and took Sakura's soul away to this world.

Fai said he'd constructed her, right? And with one of the Princess' feathers, too.

"Chii," he heard the Fai greet her as her bare feet touched the icy ground in front of him. She had a somber look on her face, and she reached down to take Fai's hands in her own. The mage turned a bit to face her, and Kurogane saw what could have been a smile, though it was small. The two spoke for a moment more, but in hushed whispers, and the powerful wind overpowering their voices. Kurogane exchanged glances with Shaoran, confirming that he couldn't hear them either.

Fai turned to them a moment later, his expression apathetic. "Chii will take us to where we will be staying."

The doll walked forward and then held out her hand, palm facing upward. "Everyone must put their hands on each other, on top of Chii's," she instructed in a childlike voice. A moment of hesitation passed before Shaoran put his hand down atop her's first, then Fai, then Kurogane, who glanced for a small second at the blonde and noticed him flinch slightly at the contact. Before Kurogane had time to get upset however, Chii placed her other hand atop his, sandwiching all of their hands between hers, and when he blinked, they were all inside some sort of stone structure. He looked up past Fai to see an opening quite a distance away.

They were in a cave.

Everyone's hands dropped to the sides gradually, and Fai turned to the artificial woman beside him. "Thank you Chii, this will do." He patted her on the head, but the smile she gave him in return was still troubled. Kurogane wondered for a moment how the doll must've understood the situation. "I want you to go back to the castle now."

She looked at him, a confused look on her face. "But Fai, the King-," Fai cut her off by flacing his pointer finger atop her lips and giving her a small smile. "I want you to go to the castle."

Kurogane was almost shocked at how the doll was responding. He didn't understand how such a lifelike thing was constructed, but he would think that it wouldn't be able to argue with what its master told it.

But Chii eventually left in a flash of blue light, and silence rang within the cave. For a while, no one said anything, but then Fai spoke flatly, "I apologize that this isn't as nice as our previous destinations."

Neither Shaoran now Kurogane replied to his statement, but then the boy asked, "What are we planning on?"

The wizard turned to face them, but gazed at the ground. "We need to stay here for the night. Tomorrow we will go in search of Sakura's body, which I'm sure is in the castle. But there's no doubt that the King felt our arrival in this world, and he'll be looking for us. With one of my eyes missing, and half of my magic gone with it, it will be a considerably harder task for him to trace me."

Kurogane stepped forward. "So you're still running?"

Fai looked up at him, his one blue eye reflecting the cold ice around them. "It is the safest thing to do right now," he spoke with a bit of harshness in his voice. "If Ashura-Ou finds us, we'd be killed before we realized he was even here. For Sakura-chan's sake, and our own, he must remain scarce for the time being."

Moments passed while the two core into each other's eyes with their own. Kurogane searched him for some kind of emotion, anything at all. Fai's eyes had shifted at one point whilst talking, letting Kurogane know that he felt uneasy about being here, if not completely scared out of his mind.

Kurogane huffed and walked over to the cave wall and sat down with his back against it. He barely noticed Shaoran did the same thing a few feet away, and when Fai simply turned the other way.

The ninja knew that Fai was upset with them for following him into his home world. Angry, embarrassed, or whatever he felt though, Kurogane didn't give a damn. He wasn't about to let him give up his eyesight completely like some sort of martyr and go off alone, probably for good. If Kurogane hated anything more than those who held no value in their lives, it was those who believed that their absence would benefit those around them. Even he had realized quite a bit ago – albeit quite reluctantly – that this odd group of travelers had become quite a deal more to him. So why couldn't that damn wizard? If he honestly didn't want Fai around, why the hell would he have chosen to keep him alive through his own blood? But Kurogane knew that that had been the turning point for Fai's sudden coldness to everyone but Sakura. He didn't want to be close to anyone, just as Sakura wouldn't allow herself to get close to the Shaoran that was with them now.

Kurogane didn't remember growing tired or falling asleep. All he knew was that one point it had been at least mid-day, and now the cave had grown dark, almost pitch-black. Glancing around, he saw Shaoran asleep across the way from him, Mokona asleep in his lap. But upon further inspection, he realized that Fai was nowhere in sight. The ninja stood up and took a few steps further into the cave, but still he didn't see him. A little confused, Kurogane wondered where in the hell he could have went, but then something hit him.

That bastard… he left them!

Gritting his teeth, Kurogane turned and ran out of the cave, and was met with the same snowstorm that had been raging upon their arrival, and it didn't seem to have let up at all. He squinted through the mass of white, not even knowing if Fai was anywhere near the area anymore, but still he decided to walk forward.

The scenery around him never changed, so it was difficult to tell which direction he was going, and the darkness of night didn't help in the least bit. He could barely even see the ground below his feet.

He didn't know how long he'd been walking before he finally spotted a figure wearing a familiar white coat a good distance away. He picked up his pace, eager to get to the wizard and beat him over the head.

"Oi!" he called once he knew he was within hearing range. The wizard turned at the call, but didn't look surprised when he saw Kurogane towering over him. "What happened to making ourselves scarce?" he demanded.

"Why did you come out here?" Fai countered.

"I thought you were trying to leave without us."

"Who says I wasn't?"

"You were just standing here."

Fai hummed in response and turned his gaze to his front once more. Kurogane's frown deepened. "So why did you come out here?"

The wizard didn't respond, and the two simply stood there with the snow pelting down on them. Frustrated now, Kurogane marched forward and grabbed Fai by the wrist, who did nothing in response but turn to him again. Kurogane thought he looked a little surprised, but he knew it was just wishful thinking on his part.

"Come on," was all Kurogane said before turning and walking back in the direction of the cave, dragging Fai along with him. The taller man hoped for something from Fai, even if it was a protest, but there was nothing. The ninja seethed to himself about how pathetic he was, and why won't you let me help me? But he did nothing.

Then he felt Fai's wrist slide free of his grip, and just when he thought that he was going to try and get away from him, Kurogane turned just as Fai simply lowered his hand to grasp the ninja's much larger one. Staring at him, Kurogane was met with his blue eye, staring right back at him. He could tell that Fai was trying desperately to keep his face void of any emotions, but he could see it. A small, almost silent plead that was escaping his very core.

_'I'm testing you… and please don't fail.'_

For a moment, Kurogane was silent and still, caught off guard quite a bit. But then, slowly but firmly, he enclosed his fingers around the mage's hand. His blue eye quivered a tiny bit, and that alone was enough to let Kurogane know that amidst the pitch-blackness of the man's heart…

Somewhere in there, there was happiness.


End file.
